my Elusive Ebenezer

EBENEZER – The Lord has brought me thus far…

I have been tasked with kind of defining or integrating my spiritual journey into a written summary. I’m too distracted sometimes when I start thinking and praying to get to THIS specific point and actually writing it.

This morning, I’ve wandered from praising God in a Psalm 136 way  to just sitting in the still/quiet of the morning and wRESTling with the concept of writing it in coherent paragraphs. Now I know more nearly how my student may feel when I am asking them to write something that seems elusive to them.

When I was younger, I think this task was easier.  Not that God is not at work and molding me – God’s business is making us into NEW creations – reforming our characters, our attitudes, our lifestyles – that conform to His Image. (2 Corinthians 5:17 for example)

From my middle-aged to past middle-aged perspective, I can say my spiritual journey has brought me to my knees  – in wretched awareness of how sinful, selfish, base, disgusting I am AND in glorious worship of how mighty, holy, forgiving, loving, supreme, constant, transforming, creative, righteous, terrifying, perfect, compassionate, awesome, life-giving my God is. When I get into my times of personal private prayer, I more and more often begin to despise the clock and my phone and intrusions like actually having to move from THAT place of intimacy and communion with God to use the washroom or go to work.

Perhaps that paragraph is my summary paragraph of my spiritual journey in recent months.

God does not expect us to be perfect in our thoughts and actions.  But He does want us to grow in our likeness to the character of His Son, my Lord and Saviour, Jesus the Christ.  This takes our time in conversation with our Father as we confess and repent and seek His face, the sunshine of His smile as we KNOW He has forgiven and as we accept His forgiveness and move on to not only DOing what He asks of us  but BECOMEing more like Him in our souls, thoughts, hearts, loves, attitudes, beings. Allowing God to BE all that the Great I AM wants to BE to us.

So I proceed in my imperfection, constantly seeking Him inwardly as I walk outwardly DOing my best which is often the opposite of what He wants. Sigh.  But backto that list- as I realize His grace and mercy and justice and etc in action, I again get on my knees and praise my Father for His loving discipline and forgiving me way past the 70 times 7 (70×7=490) times.

Now I must put on a decent shirt and move into my Saturday. Brunch with some friends is next on my agenda.  Wish you were HERE to join in!

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3 comments

  1. Great way to start my day! Love your openness & honesty Betsy! Hugs to you from all us Fawcetts in the ‘Great White North’! Gonna have to crash your pad again someday. Definitely wiuld like to spend a few weeks or a month helping out where needed once Jonathan is done his business degree & free to take more responsibility in the busineses..

  2. Great way to start my day! Love your openness & honesty Betsy! Hugs to you from all us Fawcetts in the ‘Great White North’! Gonna have to crash your pad again someday. Definitely wiuld like to spend a few weeks or a month helping out where needed once Jonathan is done his business degree & free to take more responsibility in the busineses..

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